Archive for 'The Girl'
Keeping Busy
Posted on 05. Jun, 2010 by Deb.
In the middle of dealing with the arrangements for my mother’s funeral, I mentioned to a couple of friends that the best way for me to deal with my grief was to keep busy. I need the moments of complete quiet wedged between talking with my friends and getting things accomplished. Not that my mind doesn’t wander, but it’s just how I am wired.
This morning when I woke up, I dressed, ran by Starbucks for a cup of coffee and hit the grocery store. In all my cooking last week, food had gone bad in the fridge and I had run out of some essentials like bread, fresh greens for the guinea pig, and fresh berries. I have a meeting with a new client today, rescheduled from the middle of the week.
I called my father from the store to check on him.
He was up, had fed the cats and had begun a load of laundry. We discussed the eating habits of his (very spoiled) inside cat, who consumes two or three cans of Fancy Feast a day as well as some impending work he needs done on his back. We also discussed our schedules of the day, and included in his was his plan to begin washing all of the drapes, sheets, blankets, etc in the house – a spring cleaning that had been delayed because of my mom’s illness.
“That’s at least six or seven loads of laundry, Daddy.”
“Yep. I know,” he said. ” I need to keep busy.”
Yeah. That’s where I got it from.
It doesn’t surprise me from him at all. I think I got a bit of my work-a-holic work ethic from him. And after hearing him and his three sisters talking yesterday, it surprises me less.
My father is one of four children born during the depression to a farmer. When my father was eight, they were able to have a big enough place to require a tractor and have six milk cows. His two older sisters were assigned to tend to the cows, and reported milking all six cows each morning before they would have breakfast and get ready for school. My father began doing more than just tending crops with his dad – he starting working on the tractor about that time.
Everyone deals differently. I know we are all going to have moments when we crash and burn and completely fall apart.
But in the middle, I’m just going to keep busy. Like father, like daughter.
Continue Reading
In the Age of the Internet….
Posted on 03. Jun, 2010 by Deb.
.. there is no need to buy several copies of the paper for the obituary, it’s there, online, with a guest book and everything.
Mary Beth Sprinkle, 74, went home to be with her Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, on Wednesday, June 2, 2010. Service: 10 a.m. Friday in Blessing Colonial Chapel in Mansfield. Interment: Mansfield Cemetery. Visitation: 6 to 8 p.m. Thursday at the funeral home.
via Mary Beth Sprinkle Obituary: View Mary Sprinkle’s Obituary by Star-Telegram.
There is also another copy here.
I am sharing with those of you who stop by here, but also so that I will remember to go back and look at both guest books and print out any comments for my father. He doesn’t have a computer…
It’s been a longish day. I’m almost thinking that the night of visitation is longer than the day of the funeral.
I want to thank everyone who has taken time to send me emails, tweets, direct messages, facebook messages, etc. When you do a large portion of your work on the web, and travel another portion of your work life, the in-person support isn’t as plentiful….and the virtual support is more appreciated than you can know.
It’s time for bed. One more day of extended family and the friends of my parents…
Continue Reading
Memorial Day 2010
Posted on 31. May, 2010 by Deb.
It’s Memorial Day weekend. For many, it’s a time of celebration. A time to gather with friends and families, eat BBQ, water-ski at the lake, and play. For others, it’s a time to celebrate the memories of those who gave their lives in service to their country.
Originally called “Decoration Day”, origins are traced back to the Civil War and the activities of Southern Women decorating graves. The first official observation, though, was May 30, 1868. In 1971, Memorial Day was declared a National Holiday by Congress, who established not May 30, but the last Monday in May as the official date.
In some ways, it feels odd to be in the DFW area instead of the DC area, as I have been blessed to spend Memorial Day in DC for four of the past six years. I was in DC last week, though, and was able to spend some time at The Navy Memorial as well as Arlington National Cemetery. Two favorite spots of mine. Both, spaces to remember those who have given their lives in service to our Country. Both with very personal meaning.
During the weekend, I hope you take the time to pause a moment and say a thanks to those in which we honor on Memorial Day.
(Photos are Mine, Taken Around Washington DC. First four photos are Arlington National Cemetery. The rest of the photos: Navy Memorial, WWII Memorial, Korean Memorial, Vietnam Memorial, Pentagon 9/11 Memorial)
Continue Reading
Banana Pudding
Posted on 30. May, 2010 by Deb.
At times, we must return to the roots of our childhood. In my family, those roots often lead to food. Since both of my folks have become way too thin, I made some banana pudding….from my great-grandmother’s recipe. Don’t even try to count the calories here….and if you make it, don’t try to make a low-fat version of this: it doesn’t really work.
I double the batch when I make so that there is more than enough to go around…..
In a dutch oven, mix 2 cups of sugar with 2 heaping salad spoons of flour. (a salad spoon is found in your silverware drawer…not a spoon that you would eat your cereal with, but a spoon in which you would serve vegetables with…) Add 4 egg yolks and 2 cups milk. STIR over medium heat.
You will feel like you are stirring forever. You can’t turn the heat up too much or the sugar will cause the eggs to cook too quickly.
When the custard begins to pull away from the sides of the pan, remove from heat.
Add 1/2 stick of butter and 1 teaspoon of vanilla.
This is the base of any pie or pudding. For a pudding, you will add another 1/2 cup of milk to thin it out a bit….
In a bowl, put a layer of Vanilla Wafers in the bottom and add a layer of sliced bananas. Pour pudding over the layered wafers and bananas. Top with more Vanilla Wafers.
Best if refrigerated overnight.
Continue Reading
Another Year Older
Posted on 30. May, 2010 by Deb.
I turned 42 last week.
I gave full reign to my Gypsy Soul and Workaholic Personality on my birthday: boarded a plane at 5:45 AM and was in a meeting in Philadelphia by 12:30 and ended the day with a dinner meeting, which put me getting to bed around 1 AM. It was a good way to spend my birthday: working hard and sliding between decadent Frette linens at one of my favorite hotel chains at the end of a long and satisfying day.
Not the ideal day for most, but for me, it worked. I was so thankful for the good work with a wonderful (and new) client. A new client is a wonderful birthday gift!
The following day, I boarded a train and headed down to DC where I was able to combine work for a couple of different clients with catch-up meals with friends. I saw a wonderful play at Ford’s Theatre with a dear friend and wound my way through a couple of exhibits at the National Portrait Gallery. I was also able to visit a special grave at Arlington National Cemetery during my trip, something I missed on my more harried trip into DC in early April.
There is something about being on hallowed ground that allows me to reconnect with my spiritual side.
My 41st year was tumultuous and stressful. My 42nd year will be about the continual improvement of the soul. Under my terms. Following my rules. Keeping in mind that I must continue to rebuild my faith and face it with courage.
(The photo is mine, taken May 20, 2010, Arlington National Cemetery)
Continue Reading
Pardon Me, Darlin
Posted on 17. May, 2010 by Deb.
Please forgive me if I call you darlin.
I confess that if you work in the service industry, it’s possible that I will thank you and call you darlin. Or accidentally bump into you, and apologize and call you sweetie. Or honey.
I don’t mean it to be offensive.
I’m Southern.
I likely cannot see your name tag. Or have failed to remember your name when you said it earlier in the day. Because I’m horrible at names at first, though I am fabulous at remembering faces and details about you and your life that you have shared.
So forgive me. Using a term of what some would see as endearment doesn’t mean anything beyond the fact that I am thankful that you are such a kind and wonderful human being. That your politeness and caring is appreciated.
That you have been a blessing to my life in that very moment when our paths crossed that day. Life is full of stress. And you have reminded me that people are good and kind and caring.
So, Thank you, darlin.
I share this because I offended not someone that I called darlin, but my mother. Who complained that I shouldn’t after calling a nurse sweetie, a radiology tech darlin, and the gal from food services honey. The nurse and I discussed the whole “darlin, sweetie, honey” thing. But my use of those words, though offensive to my mother, the observer, were not meant to be. It’s meant as a compliment. I’m being polite.
So, please forgive me if I offend you by calling you darlin. I don’t mean to.
This whole train of thought led to the Perfect Country and Western Song playing through my head all evening, and I woke up thinking about it this morning. It’s a Monday, and the perfect song to share to lighten the mood. Please be patient with the commentary from the legendary David Allan Coe.
And thank you, sweetie. I hope you have a great day. I may not call you by your name, but it doesn’t mean that I don’t appreciate what a wonderful person you are, darlin. Life is short. You’d be surprised at the number of folks who don’t thank them for a job well done.
Be sure and be thankful for the kind souls that cross your path on this Monday, ok, honey?
Continue Reading
Processing the Day
Posted on 15. May, 2010 by Deb.
It’s best to begin at the end of the day: Mother is back in the hospital…at least for the weekend. I’m not quite understanding the sequence of events beyond she was short of breath (she’s always short of breath), weak, and my father ended up calling 911. When the paramedics got there, they felt it was best for her to get go to the hospital. They kept her in the ER from noon until 5, then admitted her to a room finally.
She has six more radiation treatments left. It’s helping as the tumor is about half the size it was when she was diagnosed. But. She is down to 69 pounds. Granted, she has always been small, standing only 5′1″, but the weight loss is beyond extreme.
I have to tell you that I have come to admire my father and love him more, if that is possible, by seeing how he is caring for my mother. Watching him drain her chest tube today brought tears to the eyes of her nurse. My father drains her daily, something 90% of the nurses at the hospital haven’t done.
I stayed out at the hospital for about three hours, and have promised to go back by 7 AM so that my father, who she insists needs to stay the night, can go home, feed their kitty, and shower.
The earlier part of the day was spent with my youngest as we went for schedule mini-facials from Philosophy and then lunch so that we could pre-celebrate my birthday.
It’s been a longish day and my bed is calling to me….. Much love.
Continue Reading
Saturday Music
Posted on 08. May, 2010 by Deb.
Just a few “Saturday” songs to enjoy this lovely morning:
Chicago, Saturday in the Park
Livingston Saturday Night, Jimmy Buffett
And simply because I’m in a (rare) Buffett mood this morning:
What’s on your playlist this morning?
Continue Reading
Restoring the Past
Posted on 06. May, 2010 by Deb.
When I moved blogs from my dot net to this domain, I deleted more blog posts than I imported back in. At the time, I had felt I was making the right decision as the man I was seeing was jealous of the men in my past, some of which (The Pilot Guy specifically). I went a little crazy after the initial export last year and deleted over 80% of my past posts.
Earlier this week, I ran across the Wordpress file from the move and decided to take a leap of faith about lessons learned: you cannot erase the past. In fact, the events and actions of our past is what we learn from. Tonight, though I should be in bed, I imported the old posts and the only deletions I made from the import were the duplicates.
So, if you are the type to go through a persons archives, you will find some things there today that weren’t there yesterday. There is still some clean-up that needs to be done, like the restoration of some photos and the cleaning up of categories. But it feels good.
The photo, by the way, was taken on a dear friend’s back porch. On a day when I needed comfort and an escape. A part of my past – a part of my growth as a woman – a part of my evolution. Because we cannot erase the past, but we can certainly learn from it….
Continue Reading
and because I love you…
Posted on 03. May, 2010 by Deb.
Another Monday song – acoustic version 
the Bangles
Continue Reading
So Good To Me
Posted on 03. May, 2010 by Deb.
For the first time in weeks, I stayed up the first time I woke today.
Usually, the animals wake me between 5:30 and 6:30 to remind me that they are in need of food right now. Today, it was 6:05 AM. Instead of feeding everyone, keeping my eyes closed to keep the light out and surrendering to the call of my covers, I started the coffee pot and got busy. The first thing I did was strip the sheets off the bed, and with the help of Tommy the Cat, put on fresh sheets so that tonight, I will be rewarded after a long day with the sensual feel of freshly laundered Egyptian cotton.
I wish I could tell you why I was so inspired before the sun had actually risen. I have always been a morning person, true, but for the last few months, I wasn’t an early morning person. I think it’s a sign that the blues are beginning to leave me a bit. I’ve reconnected with some old friends and have made a few new web friends in the past couple of weeks. Talking with these amazing, strong, and inspirational women has helped me more than I can say. I finally wrote a column for All Things Girl after an 11-month absence. And I decided to not replace my fish.
I know that not replacing the fish that left while I was traveling may seem like something odd, but for me, it was a sign that the part of my life was over, and it was time to move on. See, the ex-boy insisted that I needed fish since they were shown to reduce blood pressure. Well, as my Cuban girlfriend, who was house-sitting for me when the fish expired put it: all they did were raise my blood pressure! (Believe me when I say that the story of their expiration is humorous…I must tell it to you soon).
Anyhoo.
Yesterday, I went through the arduous task of dismantling the 10-gallon tank, which went promptly to the curb. Then, I moved the cedar chest that was serving as a tank-stand into the spare room and out of my dining room. Later last night, my dear Cuban friend came back over and helped me further rearrange the furniture in the dining nook of my kitchen. Eliminating that bulky chest and the fish tank opened up this amazing space in there. We moved the China Cabinet and then pulled the leaf out of the kitchen table. WOW. Seriously. I never knew that those few things could make my kitchen/dining area so much more inviting. So, this morning, when I stumbled into the kitchen to feed the remaining creatures of The Menagerie, I felt as if I had the space to really breathe.
I know that Mondays come a bit too often for most of us, but today, Monday was a welcome day. A fresh start with an smorgasbord of opportunities. A day to be celebrated and embrace, instead of a day to hide myself back in the covers.
It’s a beautiful day out there. I hope you are able to find the blessings in your day. If not, maybe the lovely harmonies of The Mamas and the Papas will put your day on a better path. Love and Peace, baby!
Continue Reading
In the Vein of Being Public with My Goals
Posted on 02. May, 2010 by Deb.
It’s Sunday morning. It’s the perfect day for sleeping in thanks to the cloudy skies and the almost-rainy feeling in the air, My body is doing that lanquid pull back to my bed, insisting that the mattress is what Goldilocks would wish for (not too soft but not too hard) and the sheets have that sensual crisp fill and there would be the bliss of surrendering to my dreams.
Instead, I am up and sipping on my second cup of coffee.
I’ve fed the animals, have spent some time in mediation and have caught up on my email and the overnight Twitter feed. I am making some mental lists of tasks to accomplish this week. I am determined that this week will be productive.
I mentioned the WayBack machine recently, and in reviewing some almost decade-old posts, I was amazed at the sheer volume I was writing. I was traveling this past week and though I didn’t have much time to write, I did have some quiet time to think and in questioning myself as to how I was able to be so prolific, I realized that I was doing the bulk of my writing early in the morning. It was also a time before Social Media sights, like Twitter and Facebook. All this thinking led me to a few points to ponder.
- When is my mind the freshest? Mornings. In order to accomplish this, I need to get to bed earlier and get up earlier. My second freshest time is right before I go to bed.
- What is my true goal: to be a better Social Media person or be a better Writer? To be a better writer. To take these ever-flowing, copious thoughts and put them to paper.
- What’s the point of getting up earlier if I’m going to linger? That’s the point. I can’t linger and surf and play. I need to spend a dedicated 15 to 30 minutes writing.
- How can I stay caught up on things? Discipline. Focus. Goal Setting. List Making. A trusty egg-timer.
I know I shouldn’t try to add too many habits into my days at one time if I hope for them to stick, but I believe I have a plan.
- I need to return to spending an hour on Sundays to review my schedule, updating my task list, and setting mini-goals for the week. If you must know, I still believe in many of the habits I began when I was subscribing to the Covey methods for organization.
- I need to spend a small out of time meditating each day.
- I need to utilize my mornings better, and spend 15 to 30 minutes doing personal writing.
- I need to trade Scrubs re-runs at bedtime for another 30-minutes of writing.
- I need to turn distractions off during my writing time, including Tweetdeck and my email window.
The last several months have been more difficult than I could ever express, though I finally wrote a little in my column for All Things Girl. Besides rebuilding my faith in myself, I also need to embrace some other principals, like courage and passion. I am a strong woman with some solid goals. Thing is, there is only one person who can accomplish my goals, and that is me.
I am also a smart woman and know that the best way to help myself is to also allow myself to lean on my friends. I cannot continue to hide the good, the bad, and the ugly from those people who love me. If I allow my friends to hold me to my goals, so if you see that I miss more than a day or two here, please feel free to call me on it. Comment. Email me. It’s all part of me trusting that other people honestly care about me as ME instead of pretending to care because they want something from me.
I am a creative being and know that Life is a journey. I know that my spirit wants to grow and achieve. I know that with each day, I have a little more faith. And it feels right.
Much love to you and yours.
Continue Reading
All Things Girl: Heart and Soul
Posted on 01. May, 2010 by Deb.
Walk. Don’t Run. To the AMAZING new issue of All Things Girl: Heart and Soul.
You’ll find interviews with Joshilyn Jackson and Philip Anthony-Rodriquez. And so much more.
Continue Reading
Blast from the past
Posted on 25. Apr, 2010 by Deb.
Thanks to a flurry of email exchanges today, I made a visit to the Wayback Machine. I looked up something I had written and realized that I have been blogging since 09/28/2000.
Wow.
I took some time and read through some of the older postings. I found a link to the first post I made for “World Without Weblogs” for World AIDS Day, organized by Brad of Brandlands who passed away this past year. Hard to believe I’ve followed folks like Zeldman and Jim McCormick and Eric Brooks for almost 10 years. Back then, there weren’t very many blogs and the blogging community was pretty small. This was long before Twitter and Facebook. We all “knew” each other. Everyone supported each other’s writings and the ability to read so many personal stories was comforting and refreshing.
During the first three years of my blog, I met people like Lee and Melissa through my blog – people that have become some of my best friends.
I also found the logo from All Things Girl from 2004. With the 10th Anniversary of ATG coming in August and a re-design scheduled for the September issue, it’s exciting to see the growth.
2004
Current Logo – Revealed Oct. 2007
New Logo – To begin with redesign Sept 2010
I hope you’ve had a good weekend. And have a great week. I’m traveling tomorrow….
Continue Reading
Making Salmon Croquettes
Posted on 24. Apr, 2010 by Deb.
Earlier this week when I was visiting my parents. My dad is doing an amazing job taking care of my mom. Between my parent’s friends, my sister and I, we are trying to keep them stocked in food so that my father can spend his time with my mom. She was the person who cooked most often.
We sat in the living room chatting and suddenly my mother said “I want salmon croquettes. No purchased, but the ones like I used to make. My mother’s recipe. Except, she can’t make it for me. because she’s dead.” Who can resist such a sad need? I offered to make them this weekend.
To discover that converting a recipe from the 1940’s to 2010 isn’t exactly a piece of cake. The most challenging part? There are no unsweetened bran flakes on the market that do not have raisins in them. So I did what any good daughter would do: I picked out the raisins.
Directions:
Open 4 cans of boneless, skinless salmon (it comes with skin in larger cans, however, I don’t want to pick out the skin and bones). Add two eggs, a 1/4 of a chopped onion, salt, pepper, and flour. Form patties. Roll in crushed bran flakes (minus the raisins!). Place in a skillet of HOT oil and fry 3 minutes on each side.
Now. My mom wanted creamed gravy along with the salmon croquettes. I used the leftover oil to brown flour, added more pepper and milk….