Archive for 'Paying the Bills'
Another Year Older
Posted on 30. May, 2010 by Deb.
I turned 42 last week.
I gave full reign to my Gypsy Soul and Workaholic Personality on my birthday: boarded a plane at 5:45 AM and was in a meeting in Philadelphia by 12:30 and ended the day with a dinner meeting, which put me getting to bed around 1 AM. It was a good way to spend my birthday: working hard and sliding between decadent Frette linens at one of my favorite hotel chains at the end of a long and satisfying day.
Not the ideal day for most, but for me, it worked. I was so thankful for the good work with a wonderful (and new) client. A new client is a wonderful birthday gift!
The following day, I boarded a train and headed down to DC where I was able to combine work for a couple of different clients with catch-up meals with friends. I saw a wonderful play at Ford’s Theatre with a dear friend and wound my way through a couple of exhibits at the National Portrait Gallery. I was also able to visit a special grave at Arlington National Cemetery during my trip, something I missed on my more harried trip into DC in early April.
There is something about being on hallowed ground that allows me to reconnect with my spiritual side.
My 41st year was tumultuous and stressful. My 42nd year will be about the continual improvement of the soul. Under my terms. Following my rules. Keeping in mind that I must continue to rebuild my faith and face it with courage.
(The photo is mine, taken May 20, 2010, Arlington National Cemetery)
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Wordless Wednesday: MUNI Musician
Posted on 14. Apr, 2010 by Deb.
Blind man playing music in the MUNI/BART entryway, San Francisco, CA, April 2010
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Laundry List
Posted on 04. Apr, 2010 by Deb.
I was fortunate to spend a portion of my time in one of my favorite places these past few days: the Courtyard of the Hotel Monaco.
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(this photo taken in September 2008; not much has changed since then)
I didn’t get to spend as much time there as I would have liked, but part of traveling over a holiday weekend and having family obligations means less down time. In a typical trip to DC, I would have planned to stay through late Sunday or early Monday. With my mom’s illness, I needed to be home for lunch. But I digress.
The spring air combined with a much needed cocktail got my head wrapped around what needs to be accomplished during the month of April. I set about doing a bit of woolgathering and discovered that my wish list is quite long. Still, I allowed my mind to wander as I sat in the garden and thought about work and wants and needs and the need to reintroduce some creativity back into my daily life. Brief moments aren’t conducive to a real brain dump, so I saved that until my flight home.
After breakfast was served and I was enjoying my 3rd cup of coffee, I sat with pen and paper and begin listing everything that had gathered in my mind. When you end up with a laundry list of to-dos and must-dos, getting a real control over it can be a task so daunting that it’s almost paralyzing. As overwhelming as it can be, the only way to make progress is to break it down into chunks and eat it like you would an elephant: one bite at a time.
April is going to be an interesting month. I already had the beginnings of heavier than usual travel and with the (potential) new contract, that means three days a week on the road. It’s the kind of travel I like: solid contract with the ability to find my way around a new town and make it “mine”. Granted, I’d love that city to be a city like DC, but to be honest, I’m thrilled with wherever work takes me. (I can tell you that there is no Kimpton Hotel in this city – there isn’t even a single Hilton Property in the town!).
Just keep good thoughts headed my way as I break down my laundry list into those manageable bites and set out to conquer the little piece of my world!
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On the Road Again
Posted on 02. Apr, 2010 by Deb.
After months of being a bit of a homebody, I’m on the road again and the rest of this month looks to be pretty busy, which, overall, is a good thing. I won’t begin to bore you with the details of work, just know that I love at about 98% of what I do and always prefer to be busier than not busy. I got word today on a new contract and I’m thrilled. I’m always flattered (and thankful) when an old client recommends me to someone and they become a new client.
This week, work has brought me to DC, which is my favorite place to be. I won’t be able to get out and do all the things I’d like to do (I don’t think I will make it to Arlington Cemetery this trip), but I did get an opportunity for some things.
After a rough winter, DC was blessed today with clear skies, light winds, temperatures in the low 80’s, and unadulterated beauty. The crowds are pretty intense with the peak of the blossoms and a holiday weekend. But I was blessed to be able to see the true beauty that Mother Nature offers us in the Spring.
Hope you are well. It’s long past my bedtime.
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It Takes a Village
Posted on 13. Sep, 2009 by Deb.
These businesses know their customers, often on a first name basis. Their customer relationships, like every real relationship, encounter the occasional rough spot. Being small and human means making plenty of mistakes.
But when these businesses mess up, unlike AT&T or Microsoft, their customers often love them more.
This entire article really spoke to me in two ways: as a business owner and as a consumer.
I’ve been a consultant since 2003 and I treat my clients like they are friends. I find that even after a project is complete, I continue to have contact with a past client. We telephone and email (or text). Share a meal. Converse about how business is going and how the family is getting along. Sometimes, I’m able to introduce past clients to each other and they are able to form a business relationship to fill a need. It increases the strength and size of my village. Some of the work was truly a one-time thing and I may never work with a particular client again; but we keep in touch because we’ve become close enough to care.
In regards to being a consumer, I’ll be the first to admit I like to spend my money with businesses that treat me like an old friend. Some businesses have learned the knack of creating a small community of consumers. I mourned the closure of my closest Starbucks because I missed not only the employees, but the other customers I have shared a hello and a how are you with for ten years. I go to Bagel Boyz rather than Subway because the guy behind the counter remembers that I’m likely going to get tuna, even though he’ll try to persuade me that his chicken salad is just as tasty. And I prefer to stay at the Hotel Monaco in downtown DC because the staff members treat me like a long lost relative instead of treating me as just a hotel guest.
In times like these, when the economy is tight, these businesses who operate like a village are going to continue to thrive while the big boys are going to flounder. I think it’s because we see theses businesses like we see our friends: we love them and we want them to be successful.
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Legends VS. Facts
Posted on 17. Mar, 2009 by Deb.
Today, I made the drive to Waxahachie. I drove around the town square, and saw that little has changed since the 1970’s. I was wishing for light and my camera, but those can wait. It was not quite 6 AM when I drove through, too dark for photographs and besides, I had places I needed to be. I have always loved the courthouse, which was built in 1897. It’s a grand structure. If you’ve seen the movie Places in the Heart, you would have seen the town square.
My aunt is in the hospital there, and that was the reason for the trip. It’s been over a year since I’ve taken the drive there, I guess we all get lost in work and life and fail to visit quaint towns that we used to visit. and I wanted to allow my cousins to take a break since she needs someone with her the full time she is there and my cousins as well as a second cousin are taking shifts. I went early, so that my second cousin, covering the overnight shift, could head on home for some sleep. She is doing better, my aunt, so that is good. But the drive as well as the town of Waxahachie brought a flood of childhood memories to me. My grandmother, as well as two sets of aunts and uncles lived in Waxahachie, the town my mother was from.
I was the youngest grandchild on that side of the family. The closest in age to me was my cousin John, who is five years my senior. Five years is nothing when you are 41, but it’s a lifetime when you are 6. My cousins were having children long before I had my first bra. I got to stay with my grandmother more than any of the other ten grandchildren, simply do to the chronology. Grandmother was a seamstress for the Haggar Pant company, but was retired by the time I was three.
I was always fascinated with the courthouse. If you walk around the structure, you cannot help but notice the gargoyles. The legend is this: a German mason by the name of Harry Herley came to town to help with the courthouse. He stayed at a boarding house while he worked, and fell in love with the beautiful Mabel. He took that love and began the carvings of her as a tribute to his love. But Mabel spurned his advances, and as time passed, he became bitter and the carvings became uglier and more grotesque until the 12th carving you see is a twisted demon.
I believe I heard that story for the first time when I was five or six. I never tired of hearing it and never tired of looking for the carved faces that looked down upon passersby and stood guard. The artistic representation of such a tale fascinated me. There is passion in art, whether it born of love or of pain.
Beyond the names of the parties, Henry and Mabel, historians say there is no fact in the legend. They say that it’s likely traditional European Characters, such as “the green man” and a child and a demented character. And that the faces were likely not carved by Henry, but commissioned from Dallas and shipped to Waxahachie for installation. I know that history requires we look at fact, but I am a romantic at heart and prefer to the legend of Mabel and Henry over the facts.
No matter what is happening in your life, I hope you have the opportunity to take a sidetrip to something memorable from your past. It’s Spring and a good time for road trips and indulging in legends.
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Out of the Habit and Inspiration
Posted on 31. Jan, 2009 by Deb.
I almost feel like I am out of the habit of so many of my previously “regular” routine things.
Right this moment, I am mainly thinking about the whole “getting ready” thing. From April until December, I was spending 60+ hours a week with my clients, so having a down day to just bum around was rare. There were many Saturdays and/or Sundays that I still worked. Since I’ve been working from home so much lately, I have forgone dressing up in any ways. It’s not like I hang out in my jammies all the time, but I do tend to dress down, forgo jewelry and skip make-up. Well, except for Mondays when I go to school.
After spending until almost noon (crazy!) in my jammies today, I thought it would be nice of me to actually put make-up beyond lip gloss on, especially since the youngest is entertaining a friend tonight. A boy, by the way, who she insists is just a friend, but all the same, it’s a boy. But I digress. Anyhoo, since there would be other parents coming by for the drop off / pick up, I actually got fully dressed, as if I were going to dinner with a friend, not just hanging out on a Saturday night supervising the dog and two teenage friends.
And since I have been all the way dressed (ya know, jeans, shirt, matching shoes, earrings, make-up, etc) I have gotten so much done. My floundering column solidified for me. The rest of the pieces that needed editing for All Things Girl got edited. Updates I needed to make on the administrative side of ATG was done, I settled in on this design here for the blog, and I’m in a better mood than I have been in for DAYS.
I think it’s my sign that even if I’m not working face-to-face with my clients, it’s ok to wear something beyond very casual and putting on my make-up needs to be back into my regular habit (despite the fact my skin has appreciated the break). I am missing working face to face with my clients, though, if I were to be completely honest. I think my batteries have finally been recharged and I’m ready for more…
By the way, if you need a favor or want something, today is the day to ask. Because I will probably say “sure!”. Actually, I would probably say ’sure’ to you if it was within my abilities. But today, I would say it with absolute sincerity and not just because I like you.
I also got a really long email from a girlfriend of mine who lives in Santa Fe. She spent a couple of weeks in Africa for an extended vacation and came back with a new desire to dig into her own creativity. She asked me if I could help her, and I am reminded that signs are all around us if we will see them. I had just finished my column for ATG (live tomorrow) but it’s about what’s in your heart. And there, right in front of me, were her words asking me if I could help her figure out what is inside her’s.
For months, I have been toying with the idea of exploring another side of my personality – my desire to help other people and my hopes that people that I care about are living in a way that fulfills them. Since she asked if I would help, and I want to see if I can take a passion that I have and flip it into a branch of my business, I believe we are going to embark on an adventure of sorts for me to try my hand out at some guiding while she digs in, explores her creativity, and figures out where her passions really lie. She can be my guinea pig 
I find, to be honest, that working with creative people makes me more creative. I know her and she is inspirational to me anyway simply because she loves life so much. It will be a joy. I think we all need to spend time with people who bring us joy.
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Hiring a Consultant
Posted on 06. Jan, 2009 by Deb.
I make my living these days as a consultant. I love what I do and I’m good at it. I help companies – or government entities – on projects that require a level of experience in project management and logistical coordination. What I am good at is pulling things apart and putting them back together. That is my strength.
Experts in different fields are needed at times. A company may hire a consultant when their staff is either inexperienced with the process, when a company doesn’t have enough staffing for make a project succeed, or when they need a person from the outside to give an honest assessment and plan of action to meet a goal. It’s often a combination of these – and a half-dozen other things that influence a decision to hire a consultant. The hardest projects to execute are the ones that are going to require a restructuring. While a consultant gets to know a company’s employees and culture, they are not tied to the emotions of either. Stepping outside of the forest to see not only the trees, but the leaves is often the best way to affect change. A consultant assists in putting together a plan of action, and helps the company follow the plan. It’s a difficult decision to bring someone in that doesn’t live there, but it’s smart.
If you need a top notch project manager, hire me. I am passionate about my work and I love challenging situations. I’m also incredibly intelligent, as the rest of this blog will show you I know when to dig in and finalize a project myself, and when it’s time to call in someone with more expertise and experience.
I hired a consultant today. The project I needed assistance on? My body.
I took a good hard look at my body today in numbers (weight, body fat, cardio fitness, flexibility). I also looked at the health numbers from the past year (increased cholesterol, high blood pressure) as well as my lifestyle (little exercise, too much dining out, days of not eating enough, days of eating too much, not enough sleep). I generally know how to work out and I know how I should be eating, but knowing these things does not make the change automatic nor does it make me an expert.
So, I hired a trainer today. I need to get all the numbers relating to my body back in order. (I also want to improve my golf game. ) My trainer is experienced in the fat loss and has sport-specific training experience (he has trained a golfer that is on the PGA tour). I want to enjoy playing golf and not be sore from all the flexing – and I was stiff after spending an hour at the driving range on Saturday.
“Constructive” in 2009 is about questioning myself and my choices. Am I an expert at the restructuring that needs to be done to my routines in order to affect the changes I want in my body? If I am true to my intent, then there is a requirement for getting a little expert help.
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From Santa Fe to Los Alamos
Posted on 22. Nov, 2008 by Deb.
The hardest part of the public meetings was not being able to stop and enjoy the beautiful scenery.
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I’m standing here outside your door….
Posted on 03. Nov, 2008 by Deb.
I’m sitting in the Admiral’s Club at DFW airport waiting to board a flight. Sometimes, I get totally into the groove of travel and then, at other times, the groove is harder to find. Today is one of those days where the groove is a tad harder to find – maybe because I’ve been basically home for the last week.
Last night, I had these moments where I was ready to hop on a plane and get away immediately. It’s that flight-or-fight instinct and my instinct, after a long discussion with the oldest kid, was to stop fighting and just walk away for a bit to get my thoughts together. Teenagers are incredibly frustrating and infuriating at times, aren’t they? After a good sleep and some chatting wtih both Melissa and Lee on the issue, I am feeling a bit better on the discussion, but last night, yes - I was ready to go.
I honestly don’t remember being infuriating for my parents when I was a teen. Then again, I wasn’t your average teen. I was just as driven and busy then as I am now. These kids today don’t know how lucky they are (now I’m channeling my grandmother). Seriously. I maintained an A+ average, went to school full time, worked almost full time, participated in Student Counsel, Choir and Theatre. All I ask is that she do her work at school and make good grades.
Tonight is different. I’m ready to go – I miss DC. But I am also tired – and for the first time in ages, I am looking forward to being on a flight so I can take a nap. It’s ok when you nap on planes – napping at home isn’t always acceptable. Then again, the time change could have something to do with the fact that I am thinking about SLEEP when it’s only 6 PM Central (7 PM Eastern) – but since my body tends to stay on Eastern time, to my body, it’s really 8 PM. Right?
I’ve been thinking (again) about that elusive thing called balance.
Work seems to be what takes the bulk of my time – and I”m happy to give everything I have to it. I’m proud of my business and where I am in my career. But then, on afternoons like yesterday, when the kids were busy with their friends, I was home with nothing to do. Well, except write a little, which I did. But it still wasn’t “quality time”. Don’t get my wrong, I’d rather be alone and a little lonely – spending quality time with myself – than I would want to be killing time in a relationship that isn’t right. I think I’m just wishing that those relationships that are good just don’t get enough time spent on them. I honestly don’t know what the answer is for me except to continue on doing things the way I’m doing them. (as I wrote about in the July issue of All Things Girl). Work IS important to me. And most men, while understanding the work part honestly don’t understand the full extent mine is in my life. Working for yourself is incredibly fulfilling, but it also takes that level of committment.
I wonder, to be flat out honest, if I am cut out for a traditional relationship. When it boils down to it, the gypsy-soul side of my personality can make me a difficult partner in a relationship. Unless, that is, you like gypsies.
But I digress.
I’m heading back into DC to use my audit skills as I do a pre-assessment audit. I’m tired now and not quite in the groove, but I know myself well. Once the plane is coming in over DC…and we pass the Washington Monument….and then, as I drive from the airport to the hotel, I pass the Lincoln Memorial all lit up with the moon shining down on Old Abe, I’ll feel at peace and know that I am home. At least for the week….at least, until I get the urge to grab my bags and explore again….
So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that youll wait for me
Hold me like youll never let me go
cause Im leavin on a jet plane
Dont know when Ill be back again
Oh babe, I hate to go
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Songs in My Head
Posted on 04. Jun, 2008 by Deb.
I’m a long-time country fan and the last “album” i purchased was the George Strait “Troubadour“. I typically listen, at least once through, anything I buy – and for some reason, the song going through my head the most Patty Loveless called “House of Cash”. I don’t tend to watch much TV when I’m in my room, but I do play music when I’m getting ready and sometimes at night….it has been the first song I play on itunes all week. I have to, because the song is going through my head anyway, so I play it to pull it out for a bit.
Speaking of Itunes, my itunes went funky on me last night, and all of my audio books disappeared – they are still in the “purchased” listing, but that is all. I have been listening to books at night as I fall asleep. I created a playlist to list them all, but it’s odd, isn’t it, that it did that? Is it an Itunes thing – or a Vista thing?
Work has been very good this week, stressful slightly earlier, but yesterday and today have been fabulous. I love a sense of accomplishment – and really enjoy the ability to make progress. I am still very passionate about the particular contract I am working on – though I am doing some dabbling in other things.
I had a great chat with George Pellecanos last night. He is the “Man of the Month” for the August issue of ATG. He had a nice dry sense of humor and he loves the DC area – so we had some common ground. his new book, The Turnaround, is due out in August. FABULOUS story by the way.
The Pilot Guy is on my brain a bit…or should I say in my heart. I saw him just a couple of weeks ago when we got together to celebrate my birthday. On Saturday, he was driving (moving) and when I asked if he was bored or lonely, he said yes, and then asked me to meet him. I called AA to see what kind of flights there were to the spot he had picked to stop for the night – and while I could get there, getting back to DC would have been a long drawn out affair, so I said I just couldn’t. I had work I needed to do as well before Monday morning. I had a very nakedly honest moment with him when we talked later that night and told him how I was feeling – and where my head was. I am too honest for my own good sometimes. I am actually feeling a little lonely for his company this week – but I am sure I will get over it. I am actually in the mood to visit with his buddy from RIC as well – I am needing the humor – and the ability to be myself – and to be with people outside of work.
C’est La Vie….
the Weather in the DC area is kind of scary. Lots of rains, tornado warnings. I typically sleep with the blinds open, but I am thinking of closing them to shut out the scary thunder and lightening tonight. I know it’s only 9 PM, but I am getting ready to go to bed. In fact, I’ve already taken off my make-up and have my jammies on.
I hope that you are well and have lovely songs in your head and loving thoughts in your heart. Happy Hump Day! Sweet dreams, my friends…..
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the quiet life of a girl
Posted on 29. May, 2008 by Deb.
I haven’t talked much about work or really even personal stuff lately, have i?
Work first. Busy and I love it.
I have made no bones about loving what I do, and I still believe that the sign of being a success in my business is not about the balance in my bank account or the number of clients in my roster – it is about getting up each morning and looking forward to parts of my work….and knowing that I am making things easier for my clients….that is when I know I am a success. Being happy in what I am doing with a zest for work and ending the day with knowing that I am satisfied is huge to me on a personal level.
I am a focused individual and I like to be busy. I have also realized how important professionalism is to me. I have been fortunate to witness incredible professionalism in the face of stress – and I’ve also been unfortunate to be witness to folks behaving in a very unprofessional manner. The former makes me strive to be a better person – and always keep my professionalism about me in every situation. The latter makes me sad – not for myself, but that the person has so little self-respect, that they cannot maintain their professional behavior and become petty.
I’ve also recently witnessed a total breach of trust with a former client and colleague, and that made me a little angry. And, in honestly, disappointment in the parties.
Maybe it’s a little Pollyanna-ish of me, but I believe in my heart that if you treat others the way you want to be treated, that you are all the better for it.
So, that, my friends, are my thoughts on work these days.
Personal is pretty much the same as it has been. We won’t talk about my blood pressure, but we can pretend we did. ‘Nough said about that…..
I saw the Pilot Guy for my birthday when we were able to mesh our schedules to be in the same city at the same time. It was one of those times where we both had to go out of our way to make it happen…but I’m glad we did (and am assuming he was glad, too). We didn’t do anything extra special – just relax time. He had asked me to meet him this week, but there were no direct flights from DC to where he is……and I just couldn’t pull it off. He is in the middle of a move, which puts more miles between us….especially with me on the East Coast most of the time. But such is life.
I am well aware of the realities of that relationship, by the way. The foremost is that he will always be my friend if I allow it. Nothing changes the fact that I love him dearly and am blessed to have him in my life. But I also know that there will come a point when I am wanting something more. Now, however, isn’t that time.
I am in DC through the weekend. I have some work that will need to be done – report, document work, etc. – and to be honest leaving late on Friday and needing to be back on Sunday is a wasted airplane ticket. Besides, I love DC. It still speaks to the very soul of me. So, I will also take advantage of any free time I have….and get into the city to see….things. I need to get my camera out and take some new photos. I may also head to the movies (hello. Sex and the City!) – even if I go by myself. I have friends in DC, but some of them are out of town this weekend. I had no clue how many folks were at BEA, by the way.
So, tell me. How are you?
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Is it Thursday
Posted on 22. May, 2008 by Deb.
I went to dinner with The Marine Boy tonight. This month is kind of our three-year anniversary . Yep, three years ago we met and have been friends ever since. At times, there has been a teeny more than friendship, but it has always boiled down to friends. Being with him is comfortable and it’s more like I’ve known him for thirty years – instead of three. We met for Mexican food and sangria…and then he kindly dropped me off at my hotel after.
I’m struggling to stay away through Grey’s Anatomy (there is a commercial on) because after all the excitement over shoes, I couldn’t sleep last night. so I stayed up and worked. I need to pack as I need to head home tomorrow.
I’ve had a headache most of the week. But getting out tonight helped that tremendously. I need to find a better way to balance of things when I am traveling for work…
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the comfort of paper
Posted on 28. Apr, 2008 by Deb.
I spend a larger portion of my time communicating with clients, colleagues and friends via electronic means. I keep appointments and reminders on my Outlook calendar. But. Sometimes. There is nothing like paper.
Looking inwards and evaluating myself is worthless if I don’t take advantage of what I discover about myself….then what is the point?
One and off since 1998, I have used an old-fashioned “daytimer” (though I prefer the Franklin Covey System). To be downright honest, my business hasn’t gone beyond the need to handle life electronically in the last couple of years. The scope of work for my newest client is making me long to go back to tabs, paper, and a weekly compass.
Sitting on my doorstoop today…..FRESH paper….though I haven’t used the system since 2005, it was so comforting to dig in and organize my pages the way I like….and I’m looking forward to transferring appointments from electronic to paper. It will be a dual system, but for meetings and the like, you can’t always pull out the laptop.
There is comfort in paper. And comfort in the clear understanding that in some situations I function better with pens and papers…..even in the electronic age…..